31st January 2010 Sunday, 11.14am, listening to jojo~SHINee, on my way to LotOne to see SHINee.
Before this morning, I still full of excitment, because I could catch this precious time to see them in real. Weather to get their autograph or not isn't my issue, so long as I could see their live performance.
This morning I received a call from my friend to informed me that he can't go with me, and for that I would have to go alone. By right that wouldn't effect my mood, but don't know why my mood is falling down, feeling lonely again.
My auntie and even my colleagues would say I always got a lot of friends to date with, but why today I can't think of anyone to go with me. I was being silly this morning by keep on thinking negatively.
But seeing a cute baby in front of me now, I understand something, the world still so beautiful, no point to being sad because of this tiny little thing. Happy and go wherever I like, do whatever I want.
Mood is very flexible, you can make it turn to the positive side, or curve to the negetive side, as you like. So being happy or sad are all depends on your choice.
This question happened to asked by some of my plu friends around me, and I do have my own opinion on this issue.
"Should I turn from 0 to 1 to get a lover?"(or the other way)
My question back, "Is that so important whether your boyfriend is a 0 or 1?"
Let's explain, 1 is the guy who fuck (under the definition of gay sex), so called holding the male position when come to sex; 0 is the guy who being fucked, so called holding the female position (with a cock, but not ah gua, 0 still a men).
In my opinion,
So long as both are loving each other, what's the matter of being a 0 or 1. If it is true love, you shall willing to satisfy your partner, so sometime just be the one he like.
Sex "Original Rule" is guy fucking girl, popularized speaking, "guy is to attach with girl". But being a GAY, we are already going against the original rule, if we still concern with being a 0 or 1, what's the difference with sticking to the rule.
People always claim that love and sex are not equal. If you really don't care, what for choosing 1 or 0. Get who you love without caring what will happen on the bed in the future, gay don't create new rule, gay just against the original rule.
Or some might think, 1 take care of 0, e.g. guys have to take care of girls. Love don't differentiate who to take care of who, love will make you to take care of each other. When you really love one person, you shall willing to take care of him in every single second. I feel it before, do ya?
Prove it love can change. As gay exist is because love ignored gender.
31 December 2009, last day of 2009. This is my first time experience to join this new year's count down plus fireworks. My friends and I came to this river side behind Fullerton Hotel. We walk all the way from Marina Square to this place, when we passing through the under ground pass near Esplanade, there were so many people squeezing in from so many entrances to this only exit which brought us to Marina.
Back view of Fullerton Hotel
After walking for about 10~20mins, we found this place where we can sit on the smooth grass land, and we could catch nice view of fireworks later. Then 5 of us sit in a circle, bring out all our presents for gift exchange (belated Christmas) and a box of cakes from Secret Receipt, because they want to celebrate belated birthday for me as I didn't blow candle that night (I still can't escape from being 1 year older).
While they sing birthday song for me, luckily not much people join, really paiseh. A cute boy sitting next to us realised it and wish me Happy Birthday, his smile was so cute and I got electric shock, later he asked his friend to play Happy Birthday song with his guitar and he sing it for me. How sweet.
My friends first time seeing my shy face while I met cuttie, and keep on laughing at me. They asked me whether do I wanna take photo with the cute guy or not, I didn't answer and keep on pulling the grass on the ground. Actually I didn't realise this minor action of myself, but they saw it. So my best friend went to asked that guy to take photos for us and with us, so that I could have a photo of him for memory. ^^
Taking photo with cute boy!!!
Then we exchange our gift immediately before new year comes. I was supprise that the one who give me my present is my best friend, and this is the first doll I have in my life time. I love it alot and I named him XXX (guess...).
Thanks... This is Shiuji and XXX (guess...)
Before fireworks start, the cuttie went off after saying good bye to us. (T.T please don't go...) This year fireworks were so nice, maybe I myself like fireworks a lot, and I am watching with my best friends and so many nice smiling face people around, makes me fell for this multicolored splendor. But while watching this fireworks, I will still think of someone, how nice if I could watch this with someone. Don't have to hold hand, it will still be nice even he is around watching the same view with me. (just thinking...^^)
Happy New Year 2010
This is a whole new year, wish I could leave all the unhappy things with 2009, brought all the happy things over to 2010. Any New Year resolution? As follows: -
1) I can have more confidence on myself, no matter is on my appearance, study, love, friendship, career or anything, because for the past 2009, I felt myself always on the negetive side of all these.
2) Bring myself up to another level on my career, no matter is changing to another career line, or keep in my current career line. So long as there is growing.
3) Have a nicer, healthy and seducing body, don't know for what. Just feeling cool to have it.
4) Level on my singing skill, as I really love singing. If can I will brave up and go for Cafe audition. (Hard to reach that stage, but will try)
5) Brave up on everything, singing, knowing new friends, talking, and whatever, I really braveless to do anything. Train my brave.
6) Have a good result on my study. Pass every subject that I am going to sit in this year, or in previous year 2009.
7) Strengthen my English Language, don't really feels like having much inprovement. Must have improvement on listening, speaking and writting in English.
8) Love? Don't know. No point to think so much. Come whenever you want.
9) Make more new friends... I like to have many friends, but maybe this is really not my talent on making friend.
10) Write good blog. I will try not to use market English (broken English), try to strengthen my writing skill and grammer in this way.
Actually too many things wish to achieve. SO..... Just do it....
People says, 21 years old is a birthday that shows one has grown up to be an adult. He/She is now has legal capacity to sign legal contract with others in their own name. So normally people will celebrate it in a slightly special way.
This year I m finally 21, I never feel excited of being an adult, I wish I always young. But still have to celebrate right? Otherwise gotto wait another year for this special day of myself.
Original plan is to held a pajamas party, bikini party, beach party or even simple BBQ. But time don't allow, I have no time to held such a grand party, and my finance will be very tight after such a party.
In the night before my birthday, I was doing nothing at home, once the time touch 12, I received message on msn from JunJun. He don't want to bother me for the past half an hour was to give me this supprise. How sweet! But Make me recalled back last year, same time.
In that night, many of us were in msn chat room waiting my birthday to come, all bloggers were helping me count down in the chat room, some even purposely sleep late for this. They are Kevin, Yannick, Willy?, JunJun, Jon, Eric, Vern?, Chu? Who else I missed. Haha... (I will check old post to see)
This year do not have any count down, just JunJun still accompanying me here and Sen (sadly your line not good at that moment) also.
On the actual day 29th Dec 2009, 4of my colleagues and 4 of my Ipoh friends and I went for K buffet. I sang a lot tonight, took many silly photos and received crazy presents ~ red underwear from Levi's.
My Ipoh Friends ~ LHJ
Wearing it... OMG...
Although the celebration was simple, but fun. How much I wish that I have a numbers of friends to attend my party so that I could held a big party.
Levi's underwear, Bag, angpao are my Birthday presents...